Vodka: From Russia, With Love

I've decided to offer a weekly blog post on the finer arts of alcoholism ... um, I mean the finer arts of mixology and tending bar. Drink responsibly, but often. I'm going to start off this feature with a look at the most versatile of spirits (and versatility is a virtue, as any homosexual knows) ...

VODKA

So Fyodor Dostoevsky, Garry Kasparov and Boris Yeltsin walk into a bar...

Well, technically Dostoevsky's been dead for more than a century and even if Yeltsin were still alive, he busted his hip so he may actually limp in. But I am trying to make a point here. 

Psychological novels, chess and alcohol are a few things that Russia does very well. At the bar, the trio meets Mikhail Baryshnikov, who briséd in before them, proving that dance is another one of those things (somewhere, Svetlana Khorkina curses the fact that gymnastics may no longer be in the mix).

And what does this group order at the bar, you ask? Why, anything other than vodka would be an outrage — so culturally intertwined are spirit and nation. There is some contention over where vodka originated centuries ago (Poland? Ukraine?) but Russia is the country most people think of when reaching for their bottle of Stolichnaya. Mr. Yeltsin, once a president, had done his share to help that. Legend has it that Boris was so buzzed one night he called then-President Clinton during the Kosovo conflict and suggested they meet on a submarine to talk (a yellow one, I presume).

The world's No. 1-selling spirit, vodka can be made from any starch- or sugar-rich plant matter from grains such as rye and wheat to potatoes. While a vodka by definition is supposed to be without flavor, there are subtleties in ingredients and processes that can distinguish a good vodka from a great one. Yes, sometimes it's without flavor, but never is it tasteless.

Below, I'm offering five of my favorites, though some like Chopin and Belvedere I have hardly had the chance to become acquainted with. I hope to get to know them better in the future. But try any of these in your favorite cocktail or on the rocks next time you're out at the bar. It's doubtful you'll run into a ballet legend or a chess grandmaster, but a few shots of vodka and even strangers will become your closest comrades.

Favorite vodkas
1. Grey Goose: Russia doesn't have a monopoly on great vodka. As sad as it makes me to give the gold to the French over the Russians, this is the smoothest vodka I've tasted. It's pricey though so best reserved for sipping or vodka martinis.
2. Stoli: This Russian standard is the best value for your money. Their flavored line is excellent, but plain Stoli is the go-to brand for most cocktails.
3. Absolut: This Swedish import is a good mid-range vodka that sits better in a cocktail shaker than a shot glass.
4. Ketel One: This premium vodka from the Netherlands has always had a unique aftertaste, which makes it an interesting if underused addition to my liquor cabinet.
5. Skyy: The last slot goes to the California home team. This vodka from San Francisco is smooth and inexpensive, making it perfect for parties.

Favorite flavored vodkas
1. Absolut mandarin: Orange seems to blend better with vodka than any other flavoring. Mix it with cranberry juice or soda water, or turn a lemon drop into an orange drop. This is pretty interchangeable with Grey Goose l'Orange and Stoli Ohranj. For something slightly exotic, try a blood orange vodka made by Charbay.
2. Stoli Strasberi: This strawberry vodka is great for mixing (try it straight up after shaking it with peach schnapps, amaretto and an orange wedge) but sometimes harder to find than the somewhat cloying Smirnoff variety.
3. Ketel One Citroen: Perfect for a lemon drop (use meyer lemons and a decent Italian limoncello), though Absolut Citron works well, too.
4. Stoli Vanil: Add a twist to the classic White Russian with this vanilla-flavored vodka.
5. Skyy melon: A refreshing blend of honeydew, cantaloupe and watermelon — and 80 proof, too. Make a Mellonball by adding orange juice and Midori liqueur. Or add to fresh melon to give that summer fruit salad an unexpected kick.

RECIPES
The (White) Russians are coming. So break out the balalaikas and Yakov Smirnoff recordings, and mix yourself a Moscow Mule. The following recipes are culled from www.drinksmixer.com. ...

Moscow Mule (drink till you make an ass of yourself)
2 oz vodka

2 oz lime juice

8 oz ginger ale
Mix ingredients in a highball glass with ice

White Russian (for the KKK enthusiast who also enjoy a fine coffee liqueur)
2 oz. vodka
1 oz. Kahlua or other coffee liqueur
light cream
Mix vodka and Kahlua over ice in an old fashioned glass; top with cream

Pink Lenin-ade (When you're sweating into your camouflage fatigues on a hot summer day, try this pinko thirst-quencher)
2 oz vodka

1 oz triple sec

2 oz pineapple juice 

2 oz cranberry juice
Shake all ingredients with ice. Pour into an old fashioned glass; garnish with a lemon wedge and a maraschino cherry.

Ballet Russe Cocktail
2 oz vodka


1/2 oz creme de cassis


4 dashes lime juice
Shake with ice and strain into a cocktail glass.

Muscovy Martini
1 oz Stoli Zinamon vodka


1 oz Stoli Ohranj vodka

1/2 oz triple sec


1/2 oz orange juice
Pour the vodka, triple sec and orange juice into a mixing glass half-filled with cracked ice. Stir well. Strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with a twist of orange peel, first squeezing it over the drink then dropping it on top. Sprinkle a bit of ground cinnamon over the top.

Leon Trotsky (Thankfully, no ice pick is needed in the creation of this recipe.)

1/2 oz vodka

1/4 oz tequila

1 1/2 oz raspberry liqueur
Stir ingredients together in a large shot glass, and serve.

Razzsputin 
1 1/2 oz Stoli Razberi vodka

3 oz cranberry juice

2 oz grapefruit juice
Mix or blend with ice and serve in a chilled collins glass. Garnish with a lime slice.    

From Russia With Love (or at least lust)
1 1/2 oz Stoli Razberi vodka

fill with 7-Up

1 splash cranberry juice
Pour over ice in Collins glass.

Soviet (It's time may have past, but a sip of this and the Cold War will be hot again)
1 1/2 oz vodka

1/2 oz dry sherry

1/2 oz dry vermouth

1 twist lemon peel
Shake all ingredients (except lemon peel) with ice and strain into an old fashioned glass over ice. Add the twist.

Siberian Slider (Ice is the key)
1 oz white creme de menthe
1 oz vodka
1 oz white rum
Combine in a tumbler filled with cracked ice. Stir liberally and sip slowly.

Russian Iceberg
1 oz white creme de menthe

1 oz Rumple Minze peppermint liqueur

1 oz vodka
Lean an ice-filled tumbler to a 45 degree angle and pour creme de menthe down the side of the glass to fill bottom. Repeat with rumple minze and vodka, as to layer the liquors like an iceberg. Do not stir. Place a straw through the middle of the drink and serve immediately.

Russian Sunset recipe
2 oz vodka
2 oz triple sec

4 oz sweet and sour mix

1 dash grenadine syrup
Mix vodka, triple sec, and sour mix in a shaker with ice. Strain into a chilled collins glass, add a dash of grenadine to the top, and swirl slightly. Garnish with a cherry and an orange slice if desired, and serve.

Midori Green Russian (For those special Chernobyl moments)
1 1/2 oz Midori melon liqueur

1 1/2 oz vodka
cream
Pour midori and vodka over ice in a highball glass. Top with cream, to taste.

Moscow Bobsled
1 1/2 oz vodka

3 oz chocolate milk
Stir ingredients together in a mixing glass half-filled with cracked ice. Strain into a cocktail glass, and serve.